it wasn't that long ago when I was in a funk. a relentless stuck-in-your-head-black-hole-of-creativity-pool-of-self-doubt kind. perhaps you know what i'm talking about. i liken it to being in a hamster wheel running full speed pouring all sorts of emotional labour into turning a wheel that doesn't move forward no matter the effort. it's fucking exhausting.
it breaks you.
when you're going through something like that, it's hard to pull yourself out. it's not depression. it's not sadness. it's being lost inside your head like a bad soundtrack on repeat.
this is what i learned.
the ability to end the cycle of repetition requires that you find your remote that was misplaced in the dark and lint filled places of the proverbial couch of your life. it takes time but, eventually, through blood, sweat and tears, you find it. when you do, take stock of the buttons. they are unique to you and only those will work to prevent and end the loops going forward. you can't borrow a remote, unfortunately.
my remote has four buttons.
creativity is like the power button on my remote. without it, nothing else works. it's the catalyst that allows the other buttons to function. creativity needs electricity and I provide that through time, awareness, nourishment, grit and desire.
compassion is the fix-it button. sort of like the Staples "easy" button. i press compassion when i'm being hard on myself. when I'm beating myself up for all sorts of reasons that tend to start the loop again ever so softly. it allows me the space needed to step outside the situation, feeling or event and take stock of the bigger picture. compassion prevents me from losing the forest for the trees.
community is my personal Netflix - when i need a stream of inspiration and encouragement i hit this button hard and it brings the connection i need to move forward with anything.
dreams is a button that i didn't really understand. i knew it was important but i felt all sorts of odd emotions when i thought about using it. mostly guilt like in, "who am i to use dreams?". i'm hitting it often now. in fact, the more i use it, the better it works. it adds colour to everything and provides the most incredible rush of energy i have ever experienced.
that funk and finding these buttons are what drove makeher + co and makeherCOMMUNITY. it was created out of what my heart ached for.
"create what your heart aches for" ~ Laura Harris
if you are looking, i'm excited for you.
dig deep. look into the corners you thought you already searched with a different perspective. perspective gives you more light. some areas will be harder to get to than others so remember you don't have to do it alone. ask someone to help you lift the couch so you can take stock of what's under it. your remote is around, waiting to be reunited. it was never really lost, just temporarily misplaced. it's waiting patiently for you to find it.
when you do, get back to the epic show of living.